diabetic life

May 8th, 2012… ive never talked about my diagnosis story on here…and decided on the first day that i made this blog, i would wait until my “1 year Diaversery” to tell my story…

The day was strange because it was really a normal day.

8:00-3:30- This would be my last day in high school to completely enjoy being a teenager and living care free… (not that i still dont love life, i just have extra steps to take everyday) I remember distinctly that i was in biology which was my last class of the day…. my friend Abril sat infront of me and we spent the entire class period taking funny random pictures… i will never forget this memory, because just 3 hours later when i was in the hospital i remember thinking that earlier that day when i took tho:sures, i had no idea. 

6:00 pm- i cut myself by accident in the kitchen (for about 2 weeks prior, anytime i cut myself or something accident happend that i started to bleed just a little, i would test it with my brothers old blood tester. Each and every time it was over 600…i remember a night when i tested over and over and each time i checked it was 600+ or it would just say “HI” i called my brother on one of those nights and told him, he said not to worry, i was using old strips and an old meter….

by 6:30 that evening, my Dad had walked in on me testing my blood, he looked at the number and wanted me to use a different meter he had for my brother…i used it same thing…he tested himself..normal….he told me to pee on Ketostrips…. they expired and wouldnt change color anymore… i remember my grandma walking in and my sister coming over…and i was so upset because i couldnt believe this was happening…. it happened so fast…

by 7:15 i was sitting in a hospital room getting poked and had many IVs inserted into me…. my cousin came over and sat with me and i remember just watching “Storage Wars” (to this day its hard for me to sit and watch that show becuase it reminds me of the time i was in the hospital) 

by 9:00 my brother came to the hospital… i remember he helped go to the bathroom every 5 minutes.. and at i had to take this big pole thing with my bag of saline… at one point we both kind of cried in the hallway as he told that he would always be there for me, and that he would teach me everything….

by  9:30 the hospital had informed us that i would travel by ambulance the two hours to childrens hospital in San Deigo…

by midnight i was strapped into a stretcher (which i felt was so un called for…) and i remember they wouldnt let my mom in becuase it was a “liability” that made me mad…

by 3:00 am i was sitting in my room at childrens which i would live in for the next 4 days… i remember how nice the nurses were but how much i hated it there….

by 3:30 am: my grandma, mom, and dad all showed up with me in my room…..

by 4:00 am we were finally able to sleep (not that i really would) 

i remember my mom slept with me in my bed and my grandma and dad slept in the waiting room….i remember how much support my girlfriend was to me and how much support i got from everyone….. but it didnt sink in that this was a forever kind of thing for a long time…

now one year later, im on the insulin pump….my numbers are better….and my life is moving on…even if i dont want it to….its going  by fast…This last year has opened my eyes in so many ways… i know for a fact, that i am not the same person i was a year ago…. im better. 

so i started Insanity and i just completed Day 5…i need to see results….im so sore…but its starting to lift off…tomorrow is the cardio cucuit (my least favorite i think) then its the day ive been waiting for (rest) even though its a monday… :(

so last night was the first night i woke up with a low blood sugar.. (42) and wow, it really taught me one good valuable thought about type 1 diabetes…

FUCK DIABETES. 

thank you, have a nice day.

so i haven’t talked about diabetes in awhile and considering this was initially created to speak with other type 1 diabetics and share experiences  i thought i’d update it. Its been 308 days since ive created this blog, and its amazing to me how quickly time is going by„,its been 11 months since i was diagnosed, and things are going better than they were a couple of months ago regarding my diabetes. instead of remaining between 300 and 420 im not between 100 and 250, so im happy about that, but is there any other diabetic who experiences laziness  even though you understand that if you dont take proper care for yourself, you will end up in the hospital? Im not saying that im not taking insulin or anything, but im so lazy…..i need to test more, thats just something i need to do now, sometimes ill go a few days without knowing what my sugar is, which is really bad, and i know that my endo is gonna have a shit attack when i see him in 23 days… but im so busy with all the shit i do…its hard to focus on my diabetes… sometimes ill forget to bolus for my food, and wont remember until i start pissing alot and have an extreme thirst for water„,thats something i need to change. i dont know, im just wondering if anyone else is experiences or has experienced this laziness…

i think having a sickness with a sore throat sucks SO MUCH more when you have diabetes…

here’s my theory:

when you’re sick, you tend to go hyper  and naturally develop a thirst like no other, but when you have a sore throat, drinking a gallon of water isn’t that easy. 

Alot of people think of an insulin pump and know that without it they would die.. That, that little machine which resembles a beeper and is attached to you TWENTY FOUR HOURS 7 DAYS A WEEK.. Forever… Keeps them alive… & that fact still hasnt sunk in for me… Mostly i forget its even there… But wow…. Its so true… W/out this machine i would be dead.

i have lost my blood tester..i should find that…

once again, this blog has been put on the back burner in my life…im sorry. lets talk about the last 46 days in a nutshell… almost 20 pounds down. ive been eating like a complete fat ass horse, so that shouldnt be… i can only blame it on my bloodsugars.. my averages are seriously in the 300s…all the time -_-… ketones have become a normal part of life now… but im not neglecting my blood sugars? completely at least. there was a period of maybe 2 weeks when school, my livestock, and just life were so intense that calculating carbs correctly was not my top priority…as well as testing…i went 3 days sometimes without checking my sugar, but not because i didnt want to..i just didnt have the time. then my brother who is also a type 1 diabetic, and an ICU nurse, called me and told me that a girl was admitted into the ICU for the 8th time in a year with blood sugars over a 1000, how she is still alive is beyond me. but shes going into kidney failure and it just opened my eyes, and made me relize that my diabetes is the top thing on my list, fuck school, fuck work, when it comes down to studying for a final, or making it to a band rehearsal, diabetes is first. i went to the endocrinologist a couple of weeks ago, the only change my doctor made was my insulin sensitivity factor (ISF) and only because i practically begged him to change something. but now after waking up over 400 the last couple mornings and not even eating food, still correcting my BGs, AND STILL being 403…not okay. so i changed my basals myself. i know my body, so we’ll see. im also running out of infusion sites. im down to 2 more sites, and animas still hasnt sent me more, my doctor has sent an RX for more infusion sites to be sent immediately and everytime i call animas i get sent to voicemail where they will “call me back within 24 hours” this shit is getting crazy. and on top of all of this, i wouldnt say my personal is exactly in order. Thank you for listening to my recap/rant on the last 46 days :) merry christmas and happy new year!

ahh shucks…my pancreas’ battery is dying…that means i have to find a battery -_- robot problems..

im so tired of having high blood sugar….its getting old…..while losing weight is nice…its not the right way….down 15 pounds…

i think its time to change my basals…or my insulin to carb ratio….. unless im getting lazy at counting carbs….im not sure…but i havent seen a number below 180 for about 2 weeks….im still in shock at losing 14 pounds now in 2 and half weeks…. but im not spilling ketones….strange how diabetes works…

i have been neglecting this blog….most of the past post have been photos because i syncronized my instagram and tumblr…so if you have an instagram…follow me :) mjaime95…..but my blood sugars have been really bad…..so bad that in two weeks i lost 13 pounds and i havent been excercising….its just hard with my honeymoon phase ending…..my settings need to be changed… :( oh well…i have an endo appt. in dec.

turned 17 today! :) WOO! first birthday with diabetes though..oh well! 

one more day until my birthday!! :D